Ah yes, a blog… it’s like podcasting in written form!
Check in here for our thoughts and reviews that don’t make it into the weekly podcast!
31 Days of Horror – Day Eleven – Too Late (2021)
How late is too late? Not really an important question to answer but I was wondering. Anyway, we’re covering a movie today that we lovingly call…
Too Late!
Movie Details:
- Release Date: 2021
- “Run”time: 1 hour 20 minutes
- Where to watch it: Streaming
- Directed by: D.W. Thomas
- Written by: Tom Becker
- Starring:
- Alyssa Limperis
- Ron Lynch
- Will Weldon
Synopsis: A comedy store booking agent deals with her monster of a boss
Open Stab Wounds (out of 10): 5
Review: After watching my fair share of documentaries about stand-up comics and their dark childhoods and struggles on the coffee shop circuit, I feel like I was prepared for this film. I didn’t know anything about “Too Late” before I saw it on the list of the next film for us to watch. All I knew was that a dude was on the cover that looked very Paul F. Tompkins and that it was about a monster.
Adding a bit of extra details for you: Bob Devoe (Ron Lynch) is the owner of a prestigious indie comic venue. His assistant and venue booker, Violet (Alyssa Limperis), work together to get fresh talent and fresh meat… Bob isn’t just a comic proprietor, he’s a monster and a human dieter! Bob promises to take Violet from nothing to something, so long as she continues finding people for him to eat. Meanwhile, Violet finds someone to fall in love with, another standup comic, Jimmy (Will Weldon). This forms the central conflict of the film: Jimmy and Violet love each other but Bob needs food.
Since it’s based in the standup comedy world, Too Late kind of leans into horror comedy territory. However, the film does something unique in that it leans into horror… and it also leans into comedy. They never feel particularly well integrated with each other. This sense of disparate comedy and horror elements is probably best captured by the collection of standup comedians throughout the film. Their portions feel like random bits tossed in rather than important plot points. To be fair, the comics delivery is pretty good and there were some solid jokes… but it felt tacked on.
On the horror side of the house, there was very minimal gore and not a whole lot of scares. I wonder if this has to do with normalizing Bob’s presence as a monster early in the film. It might also be that it felt more like a Goosebumps or Tales from the Darkside level monster. Granted, horror doesn’t have to be scary to be good; but I think it could have helped here.
There is a theme in the film about show business, especially in the comedy circuits, about getting eaten up and disappearing by the biz. Although it’s something we’ve seen before, I don’t hold that against the movie. I would’ve liked it explored in a more nuanced way, because there’s talent here behind the movie; I don’t want show business to eat them too.
Last thing I’ll note from my intro. I mentioned the standup comedian documentaries. If one of the writers sees this review, I have an idea for you! You should make a Bob prequel set as a documentary about his monstrous rise and fall. It seems like you have some of his backstory fleshed out already. It could be a cool bit of commentary: Bob Devoe: A Horror-Comedian.
Thanks for reading and watching along with us! Be sure to keep up with all 31 days of our Halloween Horror Film coverage!
Oh, and make sure to follow Brandon on Twitter @BarnyardCruz and Kevin @Solucid!
31 Days of Horror – Day Ten – Nightmare Alley (2021)
There are a ton of streets and houses out there, and there are definitely rows and Nightmare Alleys between them, which brings us to our next movie…
Today we’re covering…
Nightmare Alley!
Movie Details:
- Release Date: 2021
- “Run”time: 2 hours 30 minutes
- Where to watch it: Streaming
- Directed by: Guillermo del Toro
- Written by: Guillermo del Toro
- Starring:
- Bradley Cooper
- Cate Blanchett
- Toni Collette
- Rooney Mara
Synopsis: A grifter reaches the heights of success, but chases them too far. Wrapped in deceit and driven by greed, he eventually meets his match.
Open Stab Wounds (out of 10): 8
Review: It is often said that a man can never escape his past. That is very much the case in tonight’s movie. A psychological thriller from the master of horror, Guillermo del Toro, we journey into a noir setting filled with lust, deceit, regret, and a fair amount of bloodshed. Tonight, we entered Nightmare Alley.
Set in late 30’s and early 40’s America, we are introduced to Stan (Bradley Cooper), a man in the middle of burying his past, both figuratively and literally. Walking away from his home after setting it ablaze, Stan hops a bus and when he gets off and finds himself beside a traveling carnival. Seeking work, he’s able to convince the carnival to hire him as manual labor, but he has aspirations to be more.
Quickly befriending Zeena the Seer (Toni Collette) and Pete (David Strathairn), Stan begins to learn the tricks of mentalism. A natural at it, Stan’s aspirations rapidly grow to bigger and more lucrative ventures, though he is constantly warned of the dangers of taking it too far. Through his time with the carnival Molly (Rooney Mara), a performer who does an electrifying act, catches Stan’s eye, and he works to woo her and convince her to move to the city to start their own act.
Cut to two years later and Stan and Molly are selling out two shows a night, performing their mentalism act that they honed over time. Then one night a woman throws a wrench in the works of the show. Seeing through their charade, she puts Stan into a spot where he has to “prove” his skills as a seer. This is our introduction to Dr. Lilith Ritter (Cate Blanchett), a psychologist who seems to have motives of her own.
During the show that Lilith attempted to take over, Stan moved into “spookshow” territory, which is the realm of psychics and true mediums. Even though he’d been warned over and over to stay out of that line of work, the possibility of hustling marks out of loads of money, drives Stan to pursue it.
Teaming with Lilith, Stan falls deeper and deeper into deception and a deep desire to prove himself. With the mark Stan has moved to, a true sense of danger starts to arise, but Stan is in far too deep before he can realize. Who can be trusted, who had his best interest, and did he become what he always hated are all things that Stan is forced to come to grips with, all leading to a fitting conclusion.
Like many of our reviews, I left this one intentionally vague to avoid any real spoilers. Del Toro, in my opinion, is a master storyteller, but his use of foreshadowing here may have been a bit much. The characters were all well crafted (and there was a stellar supporting cast!). You could tell who truly had good intentions, who was driven by their desires, and who was wielding a knife behind their back, but knowing who was who did not take away from the overall story. It was a journey to get to the end and was one I quite enjoyed.
This was definitely more psychological thriller than a frightfest, but I think that still falls under the category of horror. The fear of what we can become, if we wantonly chase our desires without consideration of the repercussions. The fear of what we can fall to when that happens. The fear of giving our heart to another. The fear of wolves hiding in sheep’s clothing. I think a lot of horror uses metaphor to show that we can be the real monsters. This movie was just a bit more direct.
BRANDON’S THOUGHTS: I didn’t watch it when Kevin wrote this. I suck. I can’t watch it without my wife who’s been on me for months… if I watched it without her, there’d be a movie on this list next year about me.
Thanks for reading and watching along with us! Be sure to keep up with all 31 days of our Halloween Horror Film coverage!
Oh, and make sure to follow Brandon on Twitter @BarnyardCruz and Kevin @Solucid!
31 Days of Horror – Day Nine – Hatching (2022)
Let’s see what else we’ve got Hatching on this, day nine, talking about our first horror import…
Today we’re covering…
Hatching!
Movie Details:
- Release Date: 2022
- “Run”time: 1 hour 31 minutes
- Where to watch it: Streaming
- Directed by: Hanna Bergholm
- Written by: Hanna Bergholm
- Starring:
- Siiri Solalinna
- Sophia Heikkilä
- Jani Volanen
Synopsis: A young gymnast in a “perfect” family finds an egg to raise on her own
Open Stab Wounds (out of 10): 5.5
Review: Spoiler alert: this is officially the first movie of the month that I rate below a 6. It’s not because it’s a bad movie by any stretch… but that doesn’t mean that I loved it.
This is the second film on the list that wasn’t a major release. This film is brought to us by way of Hulu, a horror import from Finland called, “Hatching”. I won’t say that I seek out foreign horror often, but I’m not opposed to a new film when I see it. The great and amazing thing about horror is how universal it can be, and how various cultures focus on similar stories, themes, and characters. They emphasize similarities and differences (look at Nosferatu vs. Dracula as a very thin, stretched example).
Hatching does its international part (at least between Europe and the U.S.) to give us a straightforward story of a young girl who is under incredible pressure from her “perfect” family, to be perfect. Her father is emasculated, and her mother is in an open relationship with another man. Tinja has a younger brother who’s jealous of the attention she gets.
The story kicks into its primary plot when a bird comes into the house, breaking up the perfect visage of the family and the mother mortally wounds it. Tinja eventually is led to an egg in the woods that the bird was taking care of… and that’s where the rest of our story starts. Tinja nurtures and hatches an oversized baby bird that she names Alli. Where it goes from here ends up being predictable. The large bird creature starts doing bad stuff and Tinja gets blamed for things.
I will give the movie credit for a few things. The first is the initial creature design of Alli. It is sufficiently eerie, almost Beetlejuice-like, and still cute. The early scenes with the creature and Tinja were ones that I really enjoyed.
I’ll also note that there were some good ideas that they started to explore… but didn’t fully commit. There’s an analog for Tinja being a nurturer unlike her mother. There’s also a brief scene where the father notices blood on the bed and accounts it to Tinja becoming a woman. There are things here that would’ve elevated the film more than it was.
I hate critiquing movies, because real people pout their hearts and hopes into the creation of a film. Hatching is a competently made film. It is beautifully shot, and I will say that the acting was very good. But there was something here that I couldn’t escape: every second of the film felt like a different film I’d seen somewhere else but couldn’t place. It was an unshakeable sense of familiarity that multiple checks of IMDB assured me that it was not a remake/reboot/adaptation. With that said, again, I enjoyed it, but not as much as I would have if I didn’t feel like I already saw some different version years ago.
Kevin’s Thoughts:
I didn’t think there were many frightening moments in Hatchling, but the creature effects were pretty good. A tad bit of Mommy Dearest, some Body Snatchers, and maybe a dash of a skinwalker. The Mother in this was the epitome of a narcissistic parent and left me with a yearning for her to have a taste of her own medicine.
I found Tinja and the Monster to be a good metaphor for the end of childhood innocence and what bad parenting can turn a person into. What bothered me was that the real monster (the Mother, in my opinion) didn’t seem to learn any lessons and got off with no repercussions. I suppose that is a common thing in reality though.
It was not really my style, but it was a decent film for what it is.
Open Stab Wounds (out of 10): 5.5
Thanks for reading and watching along with us! Be sure to keep up with all 31 days of our Halloween Horror Film coverage!
Oh, and make sure to follow Brandon on Twitter @BarnyardCruz and Kevin @Solucid!
31 Days of Horror – Day Eight – Who Invited Them (2022)
You might ask, “Who Invited Us” but today we’re asking (as far as 31 Days of Horror are concerned), “Who Invited Them?”
Today we’re covering…
Who Invited Them!
Movie Details:
- Release Date: 2022
- “Run”time: 1 hour 21 minutes
- Where to watch it: Streaming
- Directed by: Duncan Birmingham
- Written by: Duncan Birmingham
- Starring:
- Stars
- Ryan Hansen
- Melissa Tang
- Timothy Granaderos
- Perry Mattfeld
Synopsis: A couple in their new home run into issues with their new neighbors overstaying their welcome.
Open Stab Wounds (out of 10): 5
Review: Sometimes I go into films without a clue of what they are about. The Salton Sea is one that I watched because I grabbed the wrong case off the rental shelf; it is fantastic, by the way and I highly recommend it. Today’s movie, Who Invited Them, was added to our list by Brandon and I decided not to look anything up about it. Sometimes it is just fun to go into things blind; especially with horror.
Who Invited Them tells the story of Adam and Margot (Ryan Hansen and Melissa Tang), a young couple who recently moved into their new home in the LA hills. Their house is quickly filled with guests, as they are having a housewarming party with all their “friends.” I throw those quotes in there because none of their guests seem to even want to be there, or even like them. After all the guests leave, the couple talks about the fashionable couple that was invited, but neither of them knows who invited them (ugh! It’s so annoying when movies force the title into the dialogue).
Turns out, that fancy couple was still there and that is how we are introduced to Tom and Sasha (Timothy Granaderos and Perry Mattfeld), Adam and Margot’s new neighbors. Tom and Sasha decided to crash the party and get to know their new neighbors. Initially, the couples decide to have a nightcap, but things quickly start to go in dark directions.
Keeping in line with not spoiling the newer films on our list, I’m not going to describe the plot any further. What I will say though, is that if you’ve watched any films like this, you will not be surprised at all. I found none of the characters likable (protagonists, antagonists, nor side characters) and they all made me hope that they’d be first on the chopping block. It was a paint by numbers horror, with no real originality or compelling narrative.
This was easily my least favorite film on our list, so far. Visually it was not bad and the audio, including the music was pretty good. That being said, I was bored the whole film. They can’t all be winners and I’ve definitely sat through worse. I choose cantaloupe.
Brandon’s Thoughts: So, uh, I didn’t put this movie on the list either (despite what Kevin wrote earlier). I honestly thought he put this one on there. After watching the film last night, we talked about it a little and I was surprised he hadn’t seen it. So this is a very odd case of, “If I didn’t put it here… and you didn’t put it here… who invited them?!”
Unlike Kevin, I actually enjoyed it. It’s not going to surprise you. The biggest thing it keeps you in the dark about is what exactly Sasha and Tom’s motivations are. Is it supernatural? Just crazy? What’s going on? There’s some misdirects with Adam and Margot’s kid having some weird dreams.
What I actually liked the most is the resolution of the film. The film is decidedly sparse in the way of kills and gore, so calling this a horror movie is a stretch. But the way they ended it, and the moral essentially… love each other and love your kids. You can hate each other but never take it out on your kids, I thought was a great message. You might not be a great couple or even a *good* couple… but as long as you love each other and *try*, you’re doing something right.
Open Stab Wounds (out of 10): 7.5
Thanks for reading and watching along with us! Be sure to keep up with all 31 days of our Halloween Horror Film coverage!
Oh, and make sure to follow Brandon on Twitter @BarnyardCruz and Kevin @Solucid!